Online Dating

With our anniversary earlier this week, I found myself thinking about the road that got us to this point, and how my life truly did change in that instant when I met Richard. 

We talk about it often, and it still amazes us both how many things had to go exactly right in order for us to meet in the moment that we did. I think it was just meant to be.

Sometimes though, I wonder what my life would be like if I had never met and married Richard. I'm pretty sure I'd still be single. Living in my parents' basement, probably with five cats by this time, and watching romantic comedies every Saturday night before crying myself to sleep.

What?

I'm just guessing.

I'm thankful that I met my husband, because I honestly have no idea where you're supposed to meet your spouse once you get out of college.

In 2006 I decided to try my luck at online dating. The first site I used was eHarmony. Most of the guys matched up with me were older, uptight, without a sense of humor. I have no idea how we got matched because I love to laugh and I get so uncomfortable when I am having a conversation with someone who all but refuses to laugh or even crack a smile.

I went on one date with this red-headed guy who barely made eye contact with me the whole time, he was so shy. I remember thinking how ridiculous it was that my mom made me give her his full name and where we were going on our date in case I wound up missing or dead. Clearly, this guy couldn't even hold a conversation with me, I seriously doubted his ability to hold a murder weapon.

Another time, I went to dinner with a guy who was obsesssed - OBSESSED - with Mariners baseball. They're not even a good team! I mean, I root for the M's, cause I got hometown pride, but seriously dude, they're not a good team. Anyway, so after he had chatted about the Mariners for an hour, he was trying to describe himself to me and this is what he said:


Guy: You know that movie, 40 Year Old Virgin?


Me: Yes...


Guy: And you know that scene where they show his apartment and he's got all those action figures still in their original boxes? And they cover like every single inch of his house?


Me: Yes.


Guy: That's totally me. It's almost like that movie was about me. 

Then he smiled. Like that was actually supposed to impress me.

Then there was some preppy jerk from Bellevue that got matched up with me, and he just kept writing these long messages talking about how awesome and rich he was, and how lucky I would be if I got to go on a date with him. So I deleted him.

After I didn't have much luck on eHarmony, I decided to try Match.com. I heard about Match from a former coworker of mine who had been rejected from eHarmony since she was a four-time divorcee. She ended up meeting her fifth husband on Match and they had a "lovely Pagan wedding" or something crazy like that.

I was even further discouraged on Match. Most of the guys that lined up with my search requests seemed to already have kids from multiple previous relationships, or were divorced a few times over (probably lots of other eHarmony rejects, I assumed). 

But then. The last straw.

A guy I went to high school with found me on Match and started messaging me.

Oh holy lord of all that is embarrassing!

Not only was it a guy that:

A) I had never liked, let alone been attracted to, that was now trying to hook up with me via online dating, but 

B) I figured he was already starting a phone tree with all of our former classmates, telling them that I was a pathetic loser.

Reason #37 why I am not going to my high school reunion.

And that was the end of my online dating foray.

For the record, I don't think there is anything wrong with online dating. I have several friends who have found their true loves online, and I think that the internet has opened up the amazing ability for us to connect with The One, even if the The One lives thousands of miles away.

It just didn't work for me.

But I'm not complaining.

I think it all worked out for the best.