Being an adult sucks.

I had a realization today: It kind of sucks being an adult.

There is so much responsibility, and bills to pay, and little people who rely on you for every need from feeding them to wiping their butts. I think back to when I was in college, my parents paid my tuition, dorm/apartment fees, cafeteria/grocery bills, and even the gas for my car. Whatever money I made working I got to spend on clothes or late night trips to Wal Mart.

I thought I was suuuuch an adult. And I thought it was awesome. Wow, I had no clue what being an adult was really about.

It just seems like lately we can't catch a break. For a couple months leading up to the financing of the house we just bought (Yay! Exciting!), we were literally scraping by. It seemed like every two weeks, right before pay day we would be down to $55 in our checking account, meticulously planning who really needed to put gas in their car, and how important diapers are.

Then we closed on the house, and things shifted in our favor. For a change we had extra money in our account. We were planning to pay off the credit card, and put some in savings. It felt so good to be on the other side of things financially for a change.

For a whole five days.

Then this morning we found out that my car, our "good" car, and the only one with enough seats for our all of our family members (read: kind of an important vehicle), needed new front brakes, rotors, and dry belt.

It was currently being serviced for the 60,000 mile check, so I asked the Toyota service rep how much he thought the final cost would be for the servicing, plus replacement of the above mentioned parts.

$1,200 American dollars.

My heart sunk. Are you kidding me?? Couldn't we enjoy our financial stability just a little bit longer? Not to mention, that I could go into labor any day, so we don't really have the time to be without our car that holds all of the car seats. Sigh.

The fact is though, we need to keep that car in good shape, it is vital that that car does not totally die on us, or decide to lose its breaks on the freeway. Thankfully, there is a bright side to this story. We were able to find a local automotive repair place who gave us a quote much below Toyota's, so thank goodness for that. This is just life though; it's all part of being an adult and dealing with the issues that come along with having a family and owning cars and homes.

But can everything else please stay in good working order for at least another six months?!

Cream Cheese Stuffed French Toast

I've never posted a recipe to my blog before, that's not what I am known for, (seriously, ask anyone). I despise making meals, mainly because I am so not creative, and have trouble thinking up fun and tasty things to eat. Also, I am 98% sure my brother inherited any and all culinary skills in the family, since he is able to magically whip up the most awesome dishes with absolutely no recipe to follow, whatsoever. By the time I was born, I was pretty much left to fend for myself, which has meant as an adult relying on prepackaged foods, pizza delivery, and the occasional drive-through.

However.

This morning I was in the mood for a delicious, comfort food kind of breakfast, and so I made my most favorite french toast recipe, and it did not disappoint. As I sat at my table enjoying every delicious bite, I thought, what the heck? I shouldn't keep this delicacy all to myself, I want to share it with my friends! So, friends, here you go. A delicious, and, most of all, easy, french toast recipe, (scroll to the bottom for a healthier alternative!):

Cream Cheese Stuffed French Toast

2 slices bread (I prefer white or wheat)

1 tbsp. butter

2 tsp. cinnamon/sugar mix (optional)

2 eggs

1 tbsp. cream cheese

1-2 tbsp. maple syrup

Mix eggs and cinnamon/sugar mixture in a bowl. Dip one slice of bread in bowl and cover both sides with the mixture. Melt half of the butter on frying pan, throw dipped bread on frying pan. Flip occasionally until it is fully cooked. Repeat with second slice of bread. Place cream cheese and syrup on bottom piece of french toast, then place second piece on top, making a sort of french toast "sandwich". Enjoy!

I took this picture mid-meal, that's why it isn't exactly "pretty", but wanted to give an idea of what it looks like. Really though, who cares how it looks when it tastes AH-MAZ-ING?!

Healthy Alternative:

*Substitute diet bread (45 calories or less per slice)

*Cut out cinnamon/sugar mix, or replace sugar with a sugar substitute of your choice

*Substitute nonfat cream cheese

*Substitute sugar-free maple syrup

*Substitute no-calorie cooking spray instead of butter

I have made this recipe both ways, and it is delicious no matter which recipe you go with! A wonderfully satisfying breakfast for a fall or winter morning. Pair with hot chocolate or coffee. Yum!

You say tomato, they say kenihopter

There are a few reasons I decided to start this blog, the main being to keep myself occupied while Richard was on deployment last year. It also provides a creative outlet for me, because as much as I love being a stay at home mom, I would go just a little crazy if I didn't have a fun way to express myself, and my favorite form just happens to be writing. But another great thing about keeping a blog, is that I get to chronicle milestones my kids hit, or funny things they do, or just keep record of fun memories of them. 

Lately I have been enjoying listening as they try to learn the English language, and giggling at the funny ways in which they pronounce certain words. I don't expect a lot of my friends to really care about this post, so this is mostly for myself to be able to look back in a few years and remember how cute it was when the boys were learning to talk.

First up is Binker. He's usually really good about saying things correctly, but there are a few words that tend to trip him up:

Peep-a-boo = Peek-a-boo - He has actually already outgrown this one (sniffle, sniffle), I always thought it was super adorable though, and didn't want to forget it.

Beegles = Wiggles - Binker is really into The Wiggles, a kid's show/musical group from Australia. But whenever he talks about them, it sounds like he is talking about the dog breed instead!

Lackberry = Blackberry - We picked blackberries from our yard this year, and both the boys LOVED them, but apparently the "b" is silent.

Pasketti = Spaghetti - So I'm pretty sure this one is not unique to Binker, but it is freaking cute nonetheless!

Lellow = Yellow - Binker learned his colors this summer in preschool, and my absolute favorite is how he says "Lellow". I might even ask him 50 times a day to tell me what color yellow things are, just to hear him say it!

Music-seum = Museum - I took the boys to two different children's museums last week, and they had a blast! I'm not really sure why he inserted the word "music" in there, aside from the fact that he absolutely adores music? But he keeps saying "I like music-seum! Let's go music-seum!" 

Now for Bug. He has always been harder to understand than his brother, but that only makes his attempts at talking that much cuter!

Jeetub = Jacob - speaking of his big brother, this is how Bug pronounces his name.

Frower = Brother - As in when Bug will tackle Binker in a hug and say, "I ruv you frower!" Awww!

Kenihopter = Helicopter - Totally stinking cute. That is all.

Bumbrella = Umbrella - My mom bought each of the boys their own little Cars-themed umbrella, and Bug will run around the house with it shouting, "MY bumbrella!"

Stinker = Sticker - I looooove how he says this, and I think I will seriously cry when he stops saying it like that.

These are the only ones I can think of for now. I'm sure as soon as I post this I will instantly remember five more words that they say in a funny or unique way, but at least I have a record of these ones. I really love the ages the boys are at right now, it's so fun being able to communicate with them...you know...as much as one can with two and three year olds, and to watch them try to communicate back. They are little boys for sure, but then they will say something totally adorable that melts my heart and reminds me of the sweet little babies they used to be.

Multipurpose.

 

Yes. I can actually use my belly as a table of sorts these days. 35 weeks as of today. I have officially passed the point when Bug was born, (cue huge sigh of relief). 

And, just hours after expressing my relief on Facebook, I began having contractions. Last night they were coming every four minutes over a span of about two hours. I finally decided that if I was able to sleep through them, then it probably meant they weren't a big deal, and, I was able to fall asleep. I have felt them on and off all day, but, no longer close enough together to time.

So, what does this mean?

Well, we're headed in the right direction. But whether it will be five more weeks, or just days until we meet our newest son, I can't tell you for sure. 

In the meantime though, I will continue making use of my built-in shelf while I can.

10 Years Later

On September 11th, 2001, I was addicted to my No Doubt Return of Saturn CD. I had it on repeat in my car; I didn't bother turning on the radio on the way to school. It was the second week of my senior year of high school. Life was simple.

I made my way to the building where my first class was, probably around 7:40 in the morning. I saw a group of people huddled around a TV. I realized that something was happening, but had no clue what. Our teacher let us watch the news for maybe 15 minutes, before forcing us to our studies. I remember that whole day was filled with lots of questions, and confusion, until I got home and was able to really get caught up on the horror of what had unfolded earlier that morning in New York, Washington D.C., and Pennsylvania.

I was a 17 year old girl. 

So naive. 

I clearly remember thinking on the afternoon of the attacks, that we would never know who was responsible for them. At that time, I knew nothing of terrorists, or Al Qaeda. I equated the acts of 9/11 with murder, and in my mind, murderers usually try to hide who they are, to save their own skin. It was beyond my comprehension that anyone would actually claim responsibility or take credit for the villainous acts of that day. 

How my eyes were opened.

I was at an age where I was old enough to fully comprehend what had happened, and how terribly tragic it was. At the same time though, it was my first real exposure to anything so horrific. It was jarring.

So much death. So much loss.

I was beginning my senior year of high school; was this the world I was about to enter as an adult? Because I wanted none of it.

I can never stand up and say that my life was personally affected by what happened on September 11th, 2001. I didn't lose any loved ones, I didn't even know anyone who lived on the east coast at that time.  I know that the significance of that day to me, is eclipsed by the thousands and thousands of families and friends who did lose close ones on 9/11.

Yet, the words 9/11 will always feel like a bruise on my heart. Our country was irrevocably changed that day, and I think that most Americans share my sentiments toward it. Even if we weren't affected personally, we still take that attack personally, as U.S. citizens. And I believe it is something that will be hard for those to understand who did not live through it - my children, for instance. September 11th will simply be something they learn about in history class - it will be far away - removed from them. 

The day after the attacks, a beloved middle school teacher of mine died in a plane crash while on vacation in Mexico. The news was an added assault to the fragile state that I, and many of my classmates were in. To our young minds, it seemed the world was suddenly filled with evil and injustice. Good people die, and bad people triumph? I couldn't make sense of it.

The afternoon of September 12th, I sat in our back yard, in the sunshine. It was such a beautiful day, but it felt so wrong. It was as if someone forgot to tell the sun not shine; too many people were hurting.

My dad came outside, and started talking to me. I think he could see that I was hurt, afraid, and confused. After a while, he picked a rose from our yard, a lovely shade of pink. He handed it to me, and said, "This is something beautiful that God has made. There is still beauty in the world, and you need to hold on to that."

I have never forgotten what he said. There is pain in life, this is something that I have learned tenfold since that day ten years ago; but beauty does remain. Good remains. Oftentimes it is right in front of us, we just need to open our eyes to see it.

My heart will always break when I think of September 11th, 2001. So many dreams never reached, so many innocents taken from this earth, so many lives forever changed.

One lesson stands out though: that life is short. So very short. I try to hug my children a little longer (when they let me), and memorize how their faces look as they lay sleeping in their beds at night. Every day I kiss my husband, and tell him that I love him before he leaves for work in the morning. None of us know which day will be our last. No one can change the events of 10 years ago, and no one can prevent whatever tragedies may lay ahead. But I try to to hold onto faith and hope, and believe that through it all there is still goodness in the world.

Love your family, hold them tight. Enjoy every beautiful moment with them.

So much to do, so little time.

With all that we have going on in our lives these days, I've been feeling the pressure to get us prepared for what lies ahead - mainly having a baby, and then moving. I have started packing up items we won't need over the next four months, as well as clothing that we won't miss. I am trying to downsize where possible, selling furniture and other large things that just simply can't make the move with us (i.e. our treadmill which has been sitting in our garage, sadly neglected for far too long). On a related note, anyone interested in a treadmill?

In the midst of the downsizing though, I have also been bringing in more furniture to our bedroom: baby furniture. We only have two bedrooms in the house we're renting now. Binker and Bug currently share a room, and while there is actually plenty of space for a crib in it, I just don't feel comfortable having a brand new baby sleep in there with them. I know they wouldn't intentionally hurt him, but I worry about them climbing into the crib to get a closer look, or jumping in the crib while baby is trying to nap. So, even though I've never really been a fan of having my kids sleep in our room, we decided the best decision (and safest one), is to have baby stay with us until we move into our new house, where he will have his own room.

So earlier this week I brought Bug's old crib into our room, and today my mom helped me bring the baby changer in as well. I just spent over an hour putting away size newborn to 6 month clothes in the drawers of the changer, putting blankets and stuffed animals on the crib, and organizing diapers that I have stocked up on under the crib. Man, it feels so good to be so on top of things! (For once in my life, ha). 

The thing is, now that it is all set for baby, I feel like he should be here anytime. In reality though, I've got just under 8 weeks to go in this pregnancy. I think that because Bug was born 5 and a half weeks early, I just feel this fire under me, making me jump to action, afraid that we won't be prepared if this baby comes early too. Having a preemie will do that to you. But, I have no reason to think that I won't go to term this time. Everything is moving along on schedule, I haven't suffered any trauma, or fallen down the stairs (like I did with my last pregnancy), which, we kind of assume led to the early birth. So, for all intents and purposes, I may have just busted my butt this week getting ready for baby, only to have his things sit in our room collecting dust for almost two more months. Sigh.

As they say though, better to be prepared than not, right? And now I don't feel myself freaking out so much, thinking we won't be ready for his arrival. And it also frees me up to focus on doing more packing and move-prep while I can, before I've got three kids to think about. I'd like to hope that after the baby comes, I will still be productive, but I'm a realistic person. After having Bug I lived in my pajamas for literally a month. And it was probably two weeks after he was born, that I got around to taking a shower and washing my hair. Husband was gone, and while my mom helped out, it was just a shock to my system going from one kid to two kids, the older baby being only 10 months old at the time. Yeah, I don't know how I kept my sanity through that either. It's just a blur of staying up all night with Bug, then getting up bright and early with Binker. So, don't judge me for letting showers and appropriate clothing go by the wayside, 'k? Thanks.

One of my cousins told me awhile back that it is easier to go from 2 to 3 kids, than it was from 1 to 2, so I am hoping she is right, and that I will find that I am used to being in a state of constant chaos, so what's one more kid? Also, Husband will be home this time, so hopefully I will be able to get showers in on a daily basis. Or at least weekly.

Goodbye to Summer

It's been quiet on my blog lately, although that has definitely not been the case in our real lives. We have been busy making our way through the house buying process. Applied for a loan, signed purchase and sale agreement, completed the inspection. Busy, busy, busy. Now we are just figuring out exactly when we are going to close, and when we will be moving into the new home, all while trying to prepare for baby #3 who is due in less than two months.

At the same time, the weather lately has been awesome. And it seems even nicer, considering that we really got jipped this summer. Everyone likes to make fun of the Pacific Northwest for being such a rainy, gray climate, but our summers are typically spectacular. Beautiful. Crystal-clear. Mountains shining white in the distance, trees bright green, water a perfect, tranquil blue. And the temps hover around the 70's. Summer in the Puget Sound makes up for the depressing days of winter.

Usually.

This summer though was kind of a let down. Our sunny days were few and far between, and the crazy weather really messed with the crops too. Last year this week, I picked 20 pounds of apples from our apple tree. Right now? I doubt there are even two pounds to be picked, the tree is so sparse. And our plum tree didn't bloom at all. Wouldn't you know this was the first year I tried to grow my own garden, but the crazy weather patterns were no help, and all I ended up with was a handful of green and string beans.

So, since the weather was so fantastic last week, (and I am assuming that it will most likely be our last great week of summer), I tried to keep busy with the kids, taking them places or just playing outside, so that they could enjoy as much of it as possible before the weather turns cold.

On Wednesday, my brother and I took the kids (my two boys, and my niece), to Remlinger Farms, in Carnation. We didn't really know what to expect, but we were pleasantly surprised. It reminded us of a sort of miniature Disneyland, in a way. There were rides for the kids, animals, an empty school bus and fire truck to climb on and in, a train that you could ride around the farm, pony rides, musical entertainment, delicious food - seriously, SO much to do. The kids were in heaven.

Driving the school bus

Train Ride

Water ride

Carousel

Car ride

Thursday was another hot one, so the boys and I played in the back yard, for what may be one of our last times this summer. My kids are pretty easy to please. Hand them a hose to spray water around, and (one of the few) apples from the apple tree and they are happy. The boys just splashed around in the kiddie pool, and water table, and enjoyed being outside, one of their favorite places. Binker always says, "I like outside!" I get a little sad for him when I think of all the months we're going to be stuck inside during winter, but at least he will have school and other activities to keep him busy.

While they played happily in the water, I picked blackberries from our backyard. We don't have neighbors on one side of our house, it's just a large, overgrown blackberry field, and I can't believe that in the three-plus years we have lived here, I've never taken advantage of picking the blackberries - especially since they are my favorite. I picked several cups' worth though, and the boys were thrilled to eat them at lunch. I am thinking about making blackberry cobbler with the ones I have left.

Even though the temperatures were easily in the 80's, and we were all running around in shorts and tank tops, it was easy to see that fall is not far off. The signs of autumn are already starting to creep in.

I had to fight off a number of these spiderwebs to get the blackberries

Leaves changing color

It's always a little bittersweet to leave summer behind, but we have so much to look forward to in the coming months: Binker starting preschool, our newest son being born, moving into our very first home, and Husband beginning a new job with the Navy. Bring it on!