Yum

It's weird how memories can suddenly pop into your head, seemingly out of nowhere.

I remember being on bed rest with Ryan, and having to go in to be checked out by my doctor, to make sure that labor had slowed down, and that hopefully Ryan would keep cooking for a few more days, if not weeks. Richard wouldn't be home for a couple more days, so my mom was going to drive Jacob and me to Everett for the appointment.

When you're pregnant, you get weighed every time you go to the doctor's office. I know, how cruel, right? Like it's not bad enough that you gain thirty pounds, but they want to remind you every time you're there. They lure you in with fun things, like ultrasounds and getting to hear the baby's heartbeat - Ah! But not so fast, my dear. First, you must step upon the evil scale, whose number gets bigger with each visit.

Because of this, I have my obstetrician visits down to a science. I always book them first thing in the morning, I wear the lightest outfit possible, which is usually a light summer dress (this outfit is seriously inconvenient in the winter months), and I don't eat or drink anything until the appointment is over. As you can imagine, by the time I get out of the doctor's office I am pretty much famished. In fact, the further I get into my pregnancies, the worse it is. Near the end, I have to start bringing a granola bar or some small snack that I can shove down my mouth just as soon as the weigh-in is over...and I do my best to ignore the strange looks I get from the nurse.

Anyways, so my mom was taking me to this doctor's appointment. As we were walking out the door I decided to grab a muffin from my freezer. Yes, I keep muffins in my freezer, they last longer that way. These were actually a unique kind of muffin, individually wrapped in clear plastic, and they are called "Vita Tops", because they are just the top part of a muffin and therefore, kind of flat. So I didn't really look, I just grabbed the muffin top that appeared to be the banana bread flavor.

I tried to schedule my doctor's visit early, but it ended up being like a 10am appointment, and since I had been awake since 7:30, I was pretty hungry by the time I finished. I raced out to the hallway, and as I waited for the elevator to arrive, I pulled out the muffin, tore open the plastic wrapper and took an enormous bite.

Hm.

Something...about this muffin...seems....off.

I pulled my hand back for a closer look. Turns out, in my haste, I hadn't grabbed the banana bread Vita Top. Instead, I had grabbed an individually wrapped frozen breaded chicken patty! YUM!

Or not. And while it had somewhat thawed, it was still pretty frozen in the middle. Oh, and it tasted nothing like a banana bread muffin. Oh, and it was absolutely disgusting.

Banana Nut Vita Top

Average frozen, breaded chicken patty.

I was horrified! I spit out the bite I had taken and threw the rest in the garbage can. Sure, there were some people sitting nearby giving me raised eyebrows, but pregnancy allows you the wonderful excuse of deciding that any food, on a moment's notice, can make you want to vomit until you dry-heave.

In hindsight, maybe I should have embraced the silver lining in this situation, and gone back to have the nurse re-weigh me after my little muffin mix-up.