I See London, I See France...I See Girly Underpants

Last week I wrote about how I've been having problems with Jacob taking his diaper off. He even knows how to unhook a diaper and pull it off through the leg holes of a onesie. So I decided to try to outsmart him by putting him in a Pull-Ups diaper, since those don't unhook. The only problem is that Pull-Ups aren't designed to be peed in for 8 hours, so I had to search for Nighttime Pull-Ups. I was so excited when I found them in the diaper section at Target. I bought them and took them straight home.

They have been working pretty well, except that I recently noticed a small problem.

The Pull-Ups are Disney Princess-themed.

It wasn't until like the fourth time that I was putting one on Jacob that I actually stopped and looked at the cartoon printed on the front of the diaper. 

Yeah, I'm super observant.

I'd be that parent that buys their child a toy that is supposed to "I love you!" but instead, we get the defective one that says "I'm gonna kill you!" and I wouldn't even realize it until five years later when we're selling it at a garage sale, and some other parent, who is far more observant, points it out.

That's me.

So now I have a pack of Sleeping Beauty Pull-Up diapers that are half gone at this point, so I obviously can't return them now, and I'm certainly not going to throw them away when I paid $15 American dollars for them. I just distract the boys when I change them, so that they don't notice the pretty princess on their underpants, (to avoid causing them any sort of confusion about their masculinity). And I try to use the diapers as often as possible so that all the evidence will be gone by the time Richard gets home, because I have a feeling that my military husband would NOT be okay with his sons wearing these:

Seriously! How did I NOT notice??

Diaper Dilemma

I wrote a couple months ago about a very horrible incident I dealt with regarding Jacob and a diaper he removed during naptime. It was not fun. 

Unfortunately, things only seem to be getting worse. Jacob's aversion to diapers is growing, but, I just don't think he is quite ready to be potty trained. I don't feel like torturing him with the potty when he is unprepared, and doesn't understand, and dumping loads of frustration and tears upon both of us. I just don't want to go there. 

I don't mind waiting until he is closer to three years old, I really don't. I have visions of potty training taking just a couple days at that point, when he will fully understand and be more than willing to leave diapers behind forever. I know he is not to that point yet, and I don't see any need to force it.

And yet.

He HATES diapers. He will go to unbelievable lengths to take them off. And just when I think I have outsmarted my two year old, he goes and one-ups me.

Take last night for instance, I put him in a onesie when he went to bed, because regular pajamas - the sleeper kind, that zip up the front - don't work. He simply unzips them, and in two shakes he is naked as the day he was born. 

So I put him in a onesie, knowing that he doesn't know how to unbutton them. And what did I find this morning? Jacob, still in his onesie, still fully buttoned. But, my Houdini-esque child had somehow gotten his hands inside the onesie, undid the diaper and took it off through his shirt. Like how a woman would take her bra off. And I didn't learn to do that until I was like 20, so this kid has some serious skills.

Annoying as they may be.

Then after nap time today I went into his room, only to find him buck naked, he had taken off his pants, sweater and diaper, and was standing there saying "All clean!"

Obviously he doesn't care for them, and I am not so fond of this situation myself, but I honestly don't know where to go from here. I looked up suggestions on the internet of what other people have done. Some suggested actually duct-taping the diaper, and someone else recommended putting a t-shirt over the sleeper pajamas, so he can't undo the zipper. 

I guess I will try both of those, but if anyone of you out there have another suggestion that I haven't tried - PLEASE share. I am getting desperate.

Diapers Need Padlocks

The boys had a really big morning/afternoon today. We started off by going to the Everett Children's Museum, followed by lunch at Subway, and then a 3-mile walk. By the time we got home, I figured they would be exhausted. It is a muggy day, so I changed their diapers, took off their shoes, and decided to let them sleep with their jeans off, so that they wouldn't be so warm.

As I put Jacob in his crib, I had a thought flash through my head that perhaps I should put some shorts on him, so that he wouldn't be tempted to take off his diaper, but that thought was gone as quickly as it arrived. I just knew they would be so tired that they would go right to sleep.

A couple hours later, I heard Ryan jabbering in his crib, so I went to get him up from his nap. As soon as I entered their room, my nose was filled with the familiar scent of a dirty diaper. No biggie, I thought to myself, but then I turned toward Jacob's crib. He was sitting in the far back corner, with a guilty look on his face. I started to get a sinking feeling that something was wrong. As I got closer, I saw a discarded diaper in the middle of the crib, along with some other unmentionables.

At this point, I am sure some of you are wondering why on earth I am sharing this story. The way I see it though, is that I actually had to live it, so trust me when I say, you are getting the better end of the deal.

Anyway, so the next 15 minutes were spent throwing Jacob into a super-bubbly bath, scrubbing him really good, all while he screamed and shared his discontent. And then moving on to the hazardous materials - and salvaging what I could. Thankfully, Jacob's "Lion", his beloved stuffed animal was unharmed, and only required a good bath (trip to the laundry) himself after the incident. I believe the mattress and crib sheet will survive. The only casualty we suffered was a book, sadly, one of Jacob's favorites.

Ground Zero

This is what should be on their door after the disaster I dealt with.

On the bright side, I got a call from my husband today. I shared with him all of the fun stuff he was missing out on, and asked him if we could consider it an emergency and have him flown home to help me during this time of crisis?

It was worth a shot.