Hoarding, revisited.

Okay.

I just opened the garbage can in our kitchen and something caught my eye, something that didn't belong in there: clothes. And toys. And a sippy cup. And a baby monitor. All stuffed into a grocery bag, and thrown into the garbage can. It took me about .2 seconds to finger the culprit.

Bug. My hoarder.

I wrote about his hoarding habit before, almost a year ago, and since then, he has only gotten worse. He hoards everything - and I mean everything - from rubber balls, to mittens, to hair curlers, to scraps of paper he finds on the floor, to the toilet paper roll holder thingy. And he will hoard these items into whatever he can find, such as the DVD cabinet, cardboard boxes, clothes hampers, shoes, animal cracker boxes, his backpack, and his favorite, the grocery bag.

For your enjoyment, and as a way to maintain my sanity, (because I mean, really, at this point, it's either laugh at it or lose my mind), I have taken some photos of places I have discovered his hoarding piles.

Yeah, that's a paper towel roll.

Okay, this one is fun. Not only did he hoard small items into each of those red stocking hats, but then he hoarded the hats and his dinosaur into his high chair. He is hoarding his hoarded items. It's like Inception for hoarders, OMG.

Hoarding in his shoes. Really?

This past weekend though, I believe took the prize. I needed to use the bathroom, but when I opened the door, I was met with this:

Yes, that is correct. He hoarded in the toilet. And upon fishing the items out of the toilet, what kinds of treasures did we find? Well, for starters, about 50 plastic travel place mats (there goes $5.00 I'll never get back), the toilet paper holder, a red Santa bag from Target (the same one that is pictured about six photos up), and a baby shoe. Husband and I were holding our breath the entire time until we reached the bottom and confirmed that (THANK GOD), Bug had not attempted to flush the toilet with all of that stuff in there.

Oh, and as a side note, I just want to give a shout-out to the Lid-Lok toilet lock company for making just one more "child-proof" item that I have trouble using, yet my toddlers can - not only open - but also remove without difficulty. It's on the same list as child-proof doorknobs, and child-proof dishwasher locks. Am I smarter than a toddler? Apparently not.

A few weeks ago, I got so concerned over Bug's unstoppable hoarding that I Googled it. I was surprised to read that apparently many toddlers engage in this behavior, as it is their way of taking control over something, like their toys, in a world where they don't have much control. These articles also warned against trying to stop the child, claiming it is harmless behavior, and that if you try to stop them from doing it, it will only lead to unnecessary tantrums.

Now, I am all about avoiding tantrums, but in all my years I have never heard of toddler hoarding, and I find it hard to believe that it is that common of a thing. Is anyone else out there dealing with this issue? Even on a much smaller scale?

Please tell me I'm not alone, otherwise I am calling TLC. If I can't stop Ryan from hoarding, maybe we can at least we can get some celebrity out of it.

I Probably Belong on Some TLC Show

I am not an organized person. I hate cleaning and organizing. Labeling is definitely not in my vocabulary. I let things pile up until my mom comes to visit and kindly suggests that we have a cleaning day, because she "loves" doing it, but really I think she just doesn't want her grandchildren living with a disgusting hoarder of a mother.

The other day I decided to finally organize and put away that stack of photos that had been accumulating since last winter. I got photo boxes, one for Binker's pictures, one for Bug's pictures, and one for various family pictures, (basically my catch-all). And of course, I had to write on the back of each photo, which took an eternity! The whole time I was cursing it, as my handwriting got worse and worse. But I know that in 15 years, my boys will be looking through their pictures and they will want to know where and when every single one was taken, and I won't remember then. And it will matter! 

When I went to put the photo boxes away in the cabinets though, I realized an even bigger problem.

As I was going through my cupboards I saw, well, basically a bunch of crap. 

I have a Dip Master Pot. For, you know, all of those dinner parties I am always throwing. And I have a ton of casserole dishes, even though I wouldn't know the first thing about making a casserole, and I'm pretty sure the one time I announced I was going to look up a recipe and make one, Richard made a face and said he hates casseroles. 

I also have this antique glass, that kind of looks like a milkshake glass with a lid, that an elderly woman from church passed down to me when we got married. I was super touched that she chose to give it to me, but now I'm all, what the heck do I do with this? I'm not even sure what it's for, and if I give it away that's got to be a huge sin since this nice old woman gave it to me in a church.

Then there are the 80 bajillion books I have crammed into the cabinet that I am currently trying to sell on Amazon for like a nickel a piece (but with $3.99 shipping I make a small profit, it's simple math). Only, those books have been for sale for months and they haven't budged. 

People, all of these crazy dishes and books are overtaking our alcohol cabinet, and that is just unacceptable.

But with my cabinets so full, surely my counter tops must be spotless, you say?

Oh, but you would be wrong. We have a lovely marble-top bar, which you cannot see whatsoever, due the stacks of receipts, insurance documents, check books, and some old, unused 'Happy Birthday' napkins from one of the boys' birthdays this past spring. 

This is all sharing counter space with my computer, our printer, 10 photo frames, (because it's the only place the kids can't reach reach them and turn them into frisbees), about five DVD's, some sparklers I got at a wedding three months ago, our dust buster (which also needs to be kept out of the reach of our children), my "In Case of Emergency" cheat sheet for Husband in case I die so that he will know how to access our bank accounts, our radio, Husband's medals, and a vase with my dried wedding flowers. 

I know, I know. Why did I keep my dried wedding flowers? Well, my Grandma has this shell that she found on the beach on her wedding day in 1942, and I love that she has kept it all these years, and I thought it would be neat for me to save my wedding flowers, so my own grandchildren can wonder at them someday too. But for now I just have a vase with dead flowers that are taking up space. And obviously I can't throw them out now because that would be like blaspheming my marriage. Or something.

Sigh.

So what's a girl to do? Something's gotta give. Or at least get thrown out/given away. But dang if I am not super exhausted from organizing those pictures. Maybe I'll just wait another 10 months or so before I make any rash decisions.